Quiz: What's your conflict resilience?

Instructions: For each statement, rate yourself on a scale of 1 to 5, where:

1 = Strongly Disagree | 2 = Disagree | 3 = Neutral | 4 = Agree | 5 = Strongly Agree

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Section 1: Emotional Reactions to Conflict

 

1. When conflict arises, I feel an immediate sense of dread or panic.

2. I tend to avoid arguments at all costs, even if it means not standing up for myself.

3. I replay arguments in my head long after they happen.

4. My heart races, and I feel tense when someone disagrees with me.

5. I find it difficult to think clearly when conflict escalates.

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📝 Total Score for Section 1: ____ / 25

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🔹 Section 2: Conflict Management Style

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6. I prefer to keep the peace rather than express how I really feel.

7. I struggle to set boundaries because I don’t want to upset others.

8. If someone raises their voice, I either shut down or become defensive.

9. I often agree with people just to avoid conflict, even if I don’t mean it.

10. When conflict happens, I feel like I need to “win” to feel secure.

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📝 Total Score for Section 2: ____ / 25

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Section 3: Thought Patterns About Conflict

 

11. I believe conflict always leads to damaged relationships.

12. I worry about how others perceive me after a disagreement.

13. I assume that if someone is upset, it’s my fault.

14. I feel like conflict is a sign that something is “wrong” in the relationship.

15. I worry that speaking up will make people abandon or reject me.

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📝 Total Score for Section 3: ____ / 25

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🔹 Section 4: Coping Strategies & Resolution Skills

 

16. I have techniques I use to stay calm when conflict arises.

17. I can communicate my needs without becoming overwhelmed.

18. I can handle disagreements without feeling personally attacked.

19 I believe conflict can be productive if handled correctly.

20. I can listen to different perspectives without feeling defensive.

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Scoring & What It Means

 

🔹 80 – 100: Master of Conflict REsilience! – You handle conflict with clarity, confidence, and calm. You know how to express yourself and maintain boundaries.

 

🔹 60 – 79: Building Resilience! – You handle some conflict well but may struggle in certain areas. You would benefit from strengthening your emotional regulation and communication skills.

 

🔹 40 – 59: Conflict Avoider or Overreactor? – You might find conflict overwhelming, triggering anxiety or avoidance. CBT techniques can help you reframe conflict and respond more effectively.

 

🔹 Below 40: Conflict Feels Unsafe – You may experience severe anxiety, panic, or avoidance around conflict. This is a sign that deeper work is needed to rebuild confidence in handling difficult conversations.