Facing Panic Attacks

Living with a panic disorder

A panic attack hits out of nowhere. Your heart races, your chest tightens, and your mind spirals. You feel like you’re losing control—or worse. The fear of it happening again keeps you on edge, making daily life exhausting. But you are not alone.

Panic attacks are common symptom of relationship anxiety—especially if you are going through a break-up or divorce, or in a high-conflict relationship.

I’m a CBT therapist and Panic Expert. I provide support on a national panic helpline, helping people just like you who are managing panic attacks in real time.

WARNING: I am not a medical doctor. The information provided here is for educational and supportive purposes only and is not a substitute for medical advice. If you are experiencing sudden, severe symptoms — such as chest pain, difficulty breathing, or fainting — please seek immediate medical attention by contacting your GP or calling emergency service

What is a Panic Attack?

A panic attack is an exaggerated fear or anxiety response when there is no real danger. The mind believes there is an immediate threat, flooding the body with adrenaline and stress hormones. A panic attack usually peaks within 10 minutes and fades within 20.

These are some reasons why you may have a panic attack:

Real events: Seeing a dog if you have a dog phobia.
Memories: Recalling an embarrassing situation at a party.
Imagined scenarios: Worrying about a hospital operation.
Intrusive thoughts: Thinking, “I just know she’s having an affair.”

Sometimes, there is no obvious trigger.

What Does A Panic Attack Feel Like?

Panic attacks can cause a wide range of symptoms—not just a racing heart. Here’s what you might experience:

1️⃣ “I’m having a heart attack.”

2️⃣ “I can’t breathe—I’m going to suffocate.”

3️⃣ “I’m losing control of my mind.”

4️⃣ “What if I die right here?”

1️⃣ Tight chest – heavy/squeezing sensation. Or heart racing

2️⃣ Numbness – body “going dead” or disconnected.

3️⃣ Dizzy, lightheaded or trembling. Or hot flushes and sweats.

4️⃣ Tingling or 'electric shock' sensation

1️⃣ Overwhelm

2️⃣ Terror

3️⃣ Helpless

4️⃣ Dread

1️⃣ Hyper-focusing on bodily sensations (e.g., checking pulse).

2️⃣ Over-breathe or shallow breathe r

3️⃣ Pacing, fidgeting or rocking

4️⃣ for an exit to escape

Panic Attack vs. Panic Disorder

Panic Attack: An isolated event that’s scary but not ongoing.

Panic Disorder: An ongoing condition with frequent panic attacks and a persistent fear of having more attacks

Many people live with a panic disorder without seeking support:

They are too embarrassed to seek help
They consider it part of their personality - they are an 'anxious person' or blame GAD
They avoid situations or restrict their life to cope.

With the right support and techniques, it’s possible to get rid of panic attacks for good.

What's The Difference Between A
Panic Attack vs. Anxiety?

Many people think panic attacks and anxiety are the same, but they’re different in important ways.

Panic Attacks: Sudden & Intense

A panic attack is a sudden surge of fear or discomfort.
It happens out of nowhere and peaks within minutes.
There are intense and extreme physical symptoms and extreme thinking like you’re losing control or even dying.
It feels like an emergency - but it’s not dangerous.

Anxiety: Ongoing Nagging Worries and Stressors

Anxiety is a constant feeling of unease, fear, or worry.
It builds up over time and can last days, weeks or even months.
There are on-going physical symptoms such as trouble sleeping, restlessness, irritability and stomach issues.
It’s more of a long-term problem rather than a sudden attack.

Why Panic Attacks Can Lead To Health Anxiety

The intensity of panic symptoms can make people think they have a serious health condition
Uncertainty leads to endless online searches,
This feeds the anxiety cycle.

Panic Attack vs. Heart Attack

Heart Attack:

1. Pain Location:

✔ Pain is usually dull, heavy or crushing and can radiate to the left arm, neck, jaw or back.

✔ Often feels like a pressure or tightness in the chest.

2. Symptom Duration

✔ Symptoms often have a gradual build-up and can last longer than 20 minutes.

✔ Pain may worsen with physical activity and not improve with rest.

3. Symptoms

✔ Can cause cold sweats, nausea, shortness of breath, and pale or ashen skin.

✔ Men: More likely to experience chest pain.

✔ Women: More likely to report nausea, back pain, jaw pain, or extreme fatigue

Panic Attack:

1. Pain Location:

✔ Chest pain is usually sharp, stabbing, or localized in the center.

✔ Often accompanied by burning sensations or a feeling of being unable to breathe.

2. Symptom Duration

✔ Symptoms appear suddenly, peak within 10 minutes, and usually fade within 20–30 minutes.

✔ They do not worsen (and may improve) with physical exertion.

3. Symptoms

✔ More likely to cause tingling in hands or feet, dizziness, hot or cold flashes, and a sense of unreality (derealization).

✔ Often accompanied by catastrophic thoughts like “I’m dying” or “I’m losing control”.

When to seek immediate help:

If you have persistent chest pain, especially with numbness in the left arm, jaw pain, or sudden extreme fatigue, seek immediate medical help.

Panic Relif Tool Kit

Time to visit Your Recovery Room... I use proven techniques to help you relax your nervous system and relieve panic. The panic relief tool kit includes a Stop Panic Breathwork audio, nervous system passifiers and a mind and body anxiety detox

All my tools are free - if you are not yet a member, you just need to join up and become a member of the MindFull community to access them.