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Relationship Repair
And how to build Mindful Relationships
Having a deep, intimate, and fulfilling long-term relationship is something many of us long for. Yet in a world shaped by Western romantic ideals and the endless “sweet shop” of dating apps. modern relationships often feel more confusing than comforting. The truth? Research shows that no relationship is perfect. Even in the strongest relationships, couples face recurring problems that are not resolved.
A lasting relationship with deep connection and intimacy, isn’t built on perfection. It’s about nurturing the relationship—putting the relationship first. This means being vigilent for certain types of conflict that are relationship killers, repairing the relationship when it is wounded and navigating gridlocked issues instead of avoiding them.
This page is dedicated to relationship mastery. For those who are committed to the relationship—not just 'putting up with it'—but who want to deepen connection, break old patterns and bring their partnership back to life
What makes relationships fall apart
Most people assume that arguments cause breakups. They don’t. Those relationships that fail one of the partners secretes more adrenaline (ACTH) and is more stressed and this predicated break-up deteriorate. Learning how to regulate conflict real relationship killer is indifference—when partners stop trying, stop caring, and emotional walls replace connection.
✔️ Some couples argue a lot but stay deeply connected.
❌ Others rarely fight - their connection has gone - they are indifferent to their partner.
These four types of relationship conflict lead to divorce. They work together to erode the trust an foundations of relationships. Do you recognise any?
🔹 Attacking character / identity to divert focus
🔹 Making failures general rather than situation specific
🔹 Using unkind labels to undermine and blame
🔹 Over-generalisations to exaggerate and blame
🔹 Unkindly comparing partner to others
🔹 Won't take responsibility - shift topics or shift blame
🔹 Play the victim 'Poor me'. Use self defeating humor
🔹 Denying or fudging what happened
🔹 Diverting to past conflict - which is not relevant
🔹 Dismissing or minimising the other's feelings
🔹 Mocking, ridiculing or using aggressive humour
🔹 Eye rolling or smirking
🔹 Acting like you’re smarter or superior
🔹 Exaggerating sighs & dismissiveness
🔹 Mimicking partner in an undermining or unkind way
🔹Dismissive or one word answers
🔹 Silent treatment - refusing to respond
🔹 Avoiding eye contact & engagement
🔹 Walking away in the middle of a conversation
🔹 Diverting or being 'too busy' to respond
Recognizing your own actions is the first step to change. Taking time to reflect on whether you want to commit to the relationship—and how—is just as vital.
🏷️ Committed Relationships | 🏷️ Conflict Resolution | 🏷️ Your Conflict Response | 🏷️ High Conflict Relationships
How to have heal conflict and fall in love again
The path to healing conflict
Most couples don’t realize that healing a relationship isn’t about talking more—it’s about prioritising the relationship and repairing conflict.
Try out this simple step to start repairing your relationship:
🛠️ Step 1: Observe Your Conflict Triggers
Noticing the moment arguments escalate is the first step to breaking negative cycles. What happens?
✔ Do you withdraw or shut down?
✔ Does your partner become defensive?
✔ Do you repeat old patterns of criticism or avoidance?
📆 Book a Free Session | 👩🏼🦳 Meet Me
CBT to repair relationships
You CAN change how you respond to your partner. It’s a choice.
CBT and Gottman techniques help you:
✔ Manage emotional reactions instead of escalating fights.
✔ Identify negative thought loops that sabotage connection.
✔ Shift from resentment → repair using evidence-based tools.
Want to take the next step? Try one of my Relationship Repair Tool:
🛠️ The Conflict Pause Technique – Take 90 seconds to reset before responding. Breathe in through your nose, focus on the air moving in and out, and ground yourself by touching a table or chair.
📅 Book a Free Session | 🌀 Mindful Living - including mindful relationships
Who do I work with?
I use Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Gottman tools—two of the most research-backed approaches for repairing relationships, rebuilding trust and deepening connection. I can work with you
✔ You are in a committed relationship and you both, individually, want to strengthen your connection.
✔ Your partner won’t come to therapy, but you want to improve how you navigate conflict.
✔ You’re single and want to prepare for a healthier, more fulfilling relationship.
❌ You’re going through a breakup or divorce—for that, see my Conflict Management strategies.
❌ There is significant mental health issues
❌ There is relationship abuse